Eight Sure-fire Ways to Tell if You are a Star

1 Apr

A star always dresses in an entirely different color than everyone else in the scene. Usually it will be a striking hue to set her off from the dark colors around her. Think of a diamond in a plain gold setting.

A star will always play the downtrodden character in the story or song.  This tends to humanize the character.  As an added bonus this character who would be depressingly oppressed in real life will now seem incandescent and heroic.

The scene will fall flat when the star exits the stage. (Even if for something as inconsequential as the original staging in a musical.) But the burst of joy that emanates from the audience upon her return is worth the interminable wait.

The star never reads reviews … wink wink.

The star may give advice to the off-spring of another star if the star who is not in the production gives her okay.  (The off-spring has no voice in the matter.  He should follow the advice to the letter because, come on, who wants two stars jumping down your throat?)

Mortals have been put on this earth to adore stars. We look up to them because they live much closer to heaven than we do.

If you have even the tiniest shred of a slice of a smidgen that you may not be a star than you will never be a star.

Never think of defying the power and glory of a star.  Remember our sun is a mediocre star.

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One Response to “Eight Sure-fire Ways to Tell if You are a Star”

  1. Jamie April 5, 2011 at 10:55 AM #

    “Mortals have been put on this earth to adore stars. We look up to them because they live much closer to heaven than we do.”
    Love it.

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