The Most Unwanted Dude in North America

5 Jul

The small town country doctor who had his finger bitten off when the Doc poked him gently while examining him for a possible burst appendix didn’t want Jimmy King.

His first grade sweetheart who he almost drowned in the dunking pond at the Monroe County Fair when she tried to sneak a piece of his cotton candy, didn’t want him.

Father Georgakis who discovered his wallet missing just two minutes after he had bailed James out of jail on a charge of desecrating the parish cemetery didn’t want him.

His ex-gang mates who he ratted on just to cut his sentence by a week and then had the chutzpah to go around sweet talking their girlfriends into the sack while they posted bail didn’t want him.

His cell-mate, Good Ol’ Earl who he stabbed deep into the bowels with a sharpened spoon (Earl’s, naturally) so that the old guy’s bloody screaming would be the perfect diversion so Jimmy could escape didn’t want him.

The only ones who wanted him were the State Reformatories of Sixteen states and his sainted Ma.

 

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