30 Days to Writing a World Class Best-Selling Novel in Your Spare Time.

11 Oct

Day 1 — Fill notebook with page after page about inability to write, today.

Day 2 — Free write about how reading what you wrote yesterday makes you feel today.

Day 3 — Web surf, I mean research background of your hero. Get caught up in info about other people with your hero’s last name who have wildly different careers than the one you’ve chosen. Get curious about genealogy.

Day 4 — Research your genealogy until reaching the point where they ask for $$$.

Day 5 — Walk the dog. (I have no recollection where this day went. I must have done something besides walking the pooch ferchrissakes!) Note: Research alien abductions.

Day 6 — Jot down notes concerning a vivid dream. They could be the Rosetta Stone of your novel. “Huge blobby man — jibber jabber — abacus.” Throw notes away. Retrieve notes — just in case… Saves notes as bookmarks.

Day 7 — Day of Rest. Brain buzzing with ideas, character foibles and plot twists. Resist urge to write but let all these amazing creative juices percolate from your subconscious to marinate your brain or soul or whatever truly writes a novel while we mere mortals peck away at the keys.

Day 8 — Brain is blank. Nothing, nada, bupkes, zilch. The whole world is as dead and pointless as the earth beneath the Battle of Stalingrad.

Day 9 — Idea while walking the dog: What if crows were the size of hummingbirds? Would our opinion of crows change? Would they automatically be more adorable? And if hummingbirds were the size of crows wouldn’t we be terrified of their horrifying buzzing as they went careening through our flower beds? Could this idea be the turning point of my novel?

Day 10 — No.

Days 11 through 29 — Fill dozens of notebooks with notes on the inability to write this novel.

Day 30 — Begin reading “30 Days to Writing a Slam Dunk Movie Script”.

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