The Wacky World of Pet Negotiations.

28 Nov

We want more chunkies and gravy.

We want to go out as soon as you wake up. Not have to wait for tea or bathroom or yoghurt or the Wall Street Journal.

Every sock is our sock.

Every toy is our toy.

We are too old to learn how to sit. Don’t make us. It is stupid anyway. Hamsters don’t have to do crap.

We don’t want to make sissy or doody in the rain.

We don’t want to have to do shows in which we are moved around like puppets.

We have one name. Don’t make up hundreds of other names to call us. It just confuses us.

Don’t take any of this wrong. We love you to pieces and would climb the Rocky Mountains of broken glass just to make you smile.

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