The Crucial Differences of Being Three Years and Three Months Younger

3 Jan

You are two to three and a half steps slower in the race to the back fence. (You can try to rectify this agonizing physical handicap by yelling “it’s not fair” but it will do you no good.)

At the breaking point of a taunting argument instead of taunting back one more time you will bite, kick or push the older party.

You will ask “is it over, yet?” many times during a movie but later insist that you enjoyed it very much.

You will not go to the bathroom voluntarily. Ever. Only a near emergency will tear you away from whatever you are watching on Nickelodeon. So, you can often be seen making a mad dash for the facilities. Somehow you will run out of the room while still facing towards the tv because it is a Power Rangers commercial.

When you are away from home and forced to go to the bathroom, wonder of wonders you produce a copious amount of bathroom material. You will blame your parent for this occurrence. Nothing would have happened had you gone of your own accord. (The infamous “you always make me go” syndrome.)

You will have that hip hoppy, can’t sit still, just got to bounce off the four walls, feeling right around bedtime when everyone else just wants to read.

The worst thing about that 39 month difference (according to an interview with the younger party) is that the older person is often “bossy”.

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