God Gets Notes From His High Powered Manger

25 Apr

“Okay, the headline… Bamming job. What can I say but Badookadunk! Lots of Supreme Beings would’ve just stuck a bunch of Earths in different sizes in outer space and called it a day. But not my Big Breadwinner. This really pushes the envelope. You get a humongous, fist pumping — you go girl!– from me!

“Hope you don’t get all ballistic about a couple of tweaks. We’re both on the home team, am I right? Here’s how you could amp up the concept a bit. Batting lead-off–Is nine planets a done deal? Not sure that gives us closure as a number. Ten seems to be edgier with more ramifications and resonance.”

“But if nine is in concrete for you, at the very least we gotta 86 Mercury. I’m sorry maybe it’s because I did my undergrad at Harvard and couldn’t get the advanced shingle ’cause I had to go out and bake some donuts but I don’t get Mercury.”

“Venus, Goddess of Love– clouds that go on forever — me likey. Mars, God of War, The Red Planet –what’s not to like? Sure Mars got dinged with that John Carter 3-D dud but it’ll bounce back.”

“But Mercury? Hey, what’s that sound? Crickets, dude, crickets. L-O-S-E-R. A shtunky little rock with no sizzle whatsoever. Even Pluto’s got that dog thing going for it. Trust me. If you ditch Mercury the whole solar system goes viral on day one.”

“Jupiter? I don’t hate it. It’s beasty. Beasty usually works for me. But Jupiter with all its huge-amosity doesn’t grab me like Saturn. I mean come on, Saturn is freakin’ awesome on steroids!”

“Jupiter does have those four moons but big whoop. So, here’s my pitch. Dump those moons and pick up a couple of King Kong rings but instead of multi-colored like Saturn you make ’em black… or better yet black and silver. You could do a tie-in with the Raiders.”

“Wrap your infinite brain around that. I gotta book– NASA’s on line two.”

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